Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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