I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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