Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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