He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
