I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
