He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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