Got a toothbrush?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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