Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
