Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
