My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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