Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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