I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
