Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize