You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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