Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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