on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
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He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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