what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Randomize
