When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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