I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize