that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
