That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
