Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
