Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(212): View more from New York

Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.

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(212): Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe. http://tfl.nu/iy4x

Replies (17) Good night (1713) Bad night (739)
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(586): View more from Michigan

we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.

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(586): we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path. http://tfl.nu/fhzw

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(502): View more from Kentucky

You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.

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(502): You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear. http://tfl.nu/hwjh

Replies (17) Good night (5593) Bad night (632) Order T-Shirt
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(812): View more from Indiana

through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.

(847): View more from Illinois

ill be there in 5.

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(812): through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife. (847): ill be there in 5. http://tfl.nu/y9p2

Replies (26) Good night (8600) Bad night (864)
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(807): View more from Ontario

he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants

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(807): he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants http://tfl.nu/ed98

Replies (12) Good night (1663) Bad night (5575) Order T-Shirt
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(760): View more from California

Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty

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(760): Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty http://tfl.nu/lyuj

Replies (11) Good night (2535) Bad night (1358) Order T-Shirt
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(970): View more from Colorado

I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.

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(970): I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision. http://tfl.nu/ny2a

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(201): View more from New Jersey

we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks

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(201): we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks http://tfl.nu/c3q4

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(562): View more from California

I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.

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(562): I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up. http://tfl.nu/b3gr

Replies (5) Good night (2470) Bad night (676) Order T-Shirt
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(479): View more from Arkansas

This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"

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(479): This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!" http://tfl.nu/9tko

Replies (26) Good night (840) Bad night (1625)
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(419): View more from Ohio

I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.

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(419): I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck. http://tfl.nu/c5ir

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(647): View more from Ontario

i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night

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(647): i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night http://tfl.nu/8b8u

Replies (6) Good night (370) Bad night (1180)
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(248): View more from Michigan

The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.

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(248): The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager. http://tfl.nu/apbs

Replies (0) Good night (324) Bad night (442)
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(239): View more from Florida

Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.

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(239): Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows. http://tfl.nu/ni5n

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(303): View more from Colorado

Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?

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(303): Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail? http://tfl.nu/afmp

Replies (3) Good night (619) Bad night (181) Order T-Shirt

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