There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
My liver just had a heart attack.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Randomize
