I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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