i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
