whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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