Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Your cock deserves a montage
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
