With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
