WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize