she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I would ride that face into the sunset
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
