Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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