just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
honey bunches of taint.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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