you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
