Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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