I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?