I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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