No, you can still breathe under the balls.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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