we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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