Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
