well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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