hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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