Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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