She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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