It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
