And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
