dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
