At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
no you cant smoke seaweed
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
