fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
