And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
