I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
sex in a hospital.. check
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
